Oh, to be an evangelical Christian in a liberal American city. I know how awkward the proselytizing can be because I was the observer and recipient of it before I became one of these "unstable born-agains." Very awkward indeed. Especially now to be on the flip side of it.
I have a hard time expressing to you why you need Jesus in a way that makes sense to you even though I know you need Jesus in my mind and deep down in my soul. After all, we Christians believe some things that are hard to believe.*
But what I can do is to express what Jesus means to me. What he has done in my life.
In my marriage. I am so thankful I came to know Jesus before getting married. Jesus provides my husband and I with a wellspring of forgiveness to draw from. We can get mad at each other. But we both know we are messed up and have been deeply forgiven , so it is natural to forgive each other when we fall short. Jesus shows us that love is an action (not just a feeling) and he is a model to look to in putting others before yourself, servant leadership.
In my anxiety. I was an anxious person before I knew Jesus. I took a step towards God as I learned about Jesus and God proved himself faithful as my perfect provider. He took care of all the "big" things I was worried about (where to live, finding a job, not getting evicted from an apartment due to my barky poodle) in ways that I would never have imagined. Nowadays many of those "big" things I used to worry about don't phase me at all because... I just trust God for them. Because He's already shown me He's faithful.
In parenthood. Because I know the God who loves me loves my children even more than I possibly can. I know he will guide us in wisdom as we lead them and forgive us and bring healing when we mess up. If anything ever happens to my husband and me, I know God will still be there for our kids. I know they are really his kids, anyway, and that brings me great peace, rest, and joy.
In death. I have peace about death and eternity. I know I have the Holy Spirit in me and have seen his evidence in my life. I know I will be with Jesus when I die and raised with him at the resurrection. (See, we believe some weird things). Of course, I can worry about some of the details of how I will die, etc. But overall, I know this world is not the be all and end all, and that makes this life a lot less stressful, too.
In my identity. My value is not in what I do or don't do, but on who I am to God. Because of Jesus, I am received as a beloved daughter of God. I know He's created me with unique gifts through which I can reflect his awesomeness to others, and that makes me happy.
In the world. Freedom from the world's expectations. God's my daddy. He's the only one I'm responsible to. I wish walking this out were as easy as saying it, but it's awesomely refreshing to know. The expectations He puts on my are often much less than I would put on myself (also less than the world or my family would put on me).
As I grow. God is the source and support in maturing into the woman he created me to be. He causes me to grow in love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness and self-control.
I doubt I'm going to convince anyone, but I'm going to keep sharing and keep praying, because I want you to know Jesus, too. ...Awkward and annoying as that may sound.
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*Yup. Our God became the bastard son of an unmarried teenager and was part of an oppressed ethnic group in his day. After casting demons out of people, miraculously healing others, hanging out with prostitutes, and ticking off religious leaders (of his own religion) while teaching about the kingdom of God for a few years, he was publicly executed for blasphemy. (Now that is ironic). He died. (The Romans were good at killing people). In dying, he paid the debt for our sins to satisfy a loving and just God. Then he rose from the dead in victory over sin and death, appeared to his friends and to hundreds of other witnesses and eventually ascended into heaven where he's hanging out with God until his impending return.
He did this to restore Shalom. To restore us to relationship with God, with each other, and with creation (the world).
I don't know how to say that in a way that doesn't sound unbelievable. But it's what the Bible says. It's history. It's true. And it's good news for all who hear it and believe.
